About Last Night... More rational than last nights, I promise!

[missmara13]

I was feeling really low and messed up when I made my last entry. I'd had a great day, then it crashed to a low with the arguement. And the friend's status had gone to 'away' and she hadn't responded to the last thing I'd said, so I was really... freaking out.

Still haven't talked to her today, so I don't know what the standing is at the moment. Is she pissed at me for blurting out that I'm tired of being told how I have to write my stories? Did she disappear for some other reason and I just finbally went to bed before she got back? I have no idea at all. Hopefully she'll get on today so we can try to talk this out.

Sorry for the drama, folks, but if I tried to bottle it up it would have just gotten worse until I totally snapped and possibly really did quit writing, which is the last thing I want.

There was one plus that happened last night. After my freaking out. And after my posting. I went to chekc my Yahoo Mail and find an e-mail from the archivist for my favorite Enterprise Fanfic archive, the Warp 5 Archive at EntCommunity. She was asking if she could archive my Trip/Hoshi fanfics on Warp5. It made me feela lot better to read that e-mail, so I was able to fall asleep instead of spending all night tossing and turning because I was upset.

I'm still upset, still worried I'm going to or already have lost a friend, but I'm much calmer now then I was last night. I think what made it the worst is it's like a month short of the 1 year anniversary of the last time I had a big fight with a friend over something that, in the grand scheme of things, is stupid.

Maybe later I'll have a more cheerful and happy entry to post. I hope so.

Later.

Comments

[octoberagain.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Just think positive - in the end everything will work out. A true friend won't let the incident cause the end of the friendship... maybe she just needs some time to cool off (and thus gives you the same time). And if that happens then maybe you should look again at all of it (friendship I mean). I'm not meaning to sound bitchy I just don't like seeing you so upset. It makes me sad :(

(OT and all but I'll send you pcnet info tonight sometime).

[missmara13]

Thanks, I'm feeling better now, still a little upset, but not so... ugh... as last night or even this morning.

And YAY about the pcnet info! lol

[lacijade.livejournal.com]

Hey!! I hope things are going better for you now! Don't ever give up writing- and don't let any of us pressure you to write what you don't want too. I can wait on MOT and stuff as long as you need. Hey, we've had our share of fights and we've made it through those times right? Good luck with everything, and I'm here if you need me even if I haven't got to talk to you in awhile! Where ya been hiding? Or have I been hiding? I'll be looking for you!