Heavily Broken (Chapter Fifty Eight)
Oct. 14th, 2007 10:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
missmara13Title: Heavily Broken (Chapter Fifty Eight)
Author: Mara
Rating: R
Warnings: Sex, mentions of rape, violence. Language.
Summary: Ryan didn't call Sandy after Dawn kicked him out, but he still finds his way to the Cohen family.
Notes: ::sigh:: I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this chapter, but I've been sitting on it for a LONG time... a couple weeks... and I figured I should just bite the bullet and post it.
Heavily Broken (Chapter Fifty Eight)
Many thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
chrissydechagny for the most excellent banner!
By the time they got back to Newport, Sandy was home and he wasn't happy.
"Why is it that I called to check on visiting hours for tomorrow, and the prison told me that my wife and son were there today?" Sandy asked.
"Because I took Ryan to see Trey," Kirsten said simply, putting her purse on the table.
"I thought I..."
"You really don't want to say something that is going to make you sound like my father, do you?" Kirsten asked.
"It's a prison, Kirsten, you shouldn't be..."
"She stayed in the waiting room," Ryan interjected, wanting to defend Kirsten. "I needed to see him, Sandy..."
"And I was going to take you tomorrow..."
"Nothing happened, Sandy," Kirsten said. "I only saw the waiting room and the outside of the place, I didn't see any prisoners, no one said anything rude or crude to me. It's fine. I just took our son to see his brother."
Ryan started at the sound of her calling him their son, but liked the sound of it. "Trey would have never forgiven me if I waited to tell him," he said softly.
"We'll talk about this with you later," Sandy said. "Right now I need to speak to my wife."
"Fine," Ryan said, walking out and heading for the poolhouse. He stopped in the doorway when he spotted Summer sitting on his bed, biting her lower lip. "What are you doing here?" he asked her.
"I made a mistake..." Summer began.
"Yeah, you did," Ryan replied. "I can't even think about sex without thinking about what happened to me, and you're accusing me of cheating on you? I was in love with you, Summer. When I was with you, I could forget for a little while how royally fucked up my life is. I thought I'd tell you, and you'd hold me and tell em it would be okay, that I'm strong and I'll be okay..."
"I can..." Summer said.
"No, you can't," Ryan said. "Do you have any idea how much it hurt to have you say those things? How... I'd barely known an hour that I have HIV, and my girlfriend was being such a world class bitch to me."
"I'm sorry..."
"My Ma was always sorry. And my Dad. Who knows, maybe even those men who fucked me in alleys are sorry. But it doesn't take back any of it, it can't take back any of it. Sorry doesn't make it all better, Summer, it can't. Not when the hurt is this deep, and raw, and painful."
"Ry..."
"I can't do this, Summer. Not now, not when I'm still trying to figure out how the hell I'm gonna do anything that I dreamed of doing with my life. The one thing I always wanted is completely gone now, and I need time to deal with that before I deal with you."
"Ryan, please... I'm sorry... I love you..."
"You can't love someone you don't trust, Summer," Ryan said softly. "That's part of why this hurts so bad. I trusted that you loved me, but... but clearly you don't... not as much as I loved you."
"Ryan..."
"Please go," Ryan said, opening the door and looking away. "Please, just go."
Summer slowly stood, her hand to her mouth as she walked past him. "I... I'm sorry..." she repeated.
"Goodbye, Summer," Ryan whispered, not meeting her gaze as he closed the door. Slowly, he walked over to his bed and sat down, aware that Summer was still standing out there, watching him with wide, tear filled eyes.
~~~
Dinner was tense, but manageable, especially since Seth kept things lighter by talking about how great Che was once you got to know him. It was after dinner that things took a turn for the worse. Ryan and Kirsten were prewashing the dishes while Seth was in the living room trying to pick a game to play with Ryan, and Sandy approached them. "I had my reasons for wanting to be the one who took Ryan," he said.
"Then explain them to us, Sandy," Kirsten said, making it clear that she wanted Ryan to stay for this. "Explain why you wanted to make him wait another day."
"Ryan, we've seen what your mother does to you, we've seen it twice..." Sandy began.
"Trey is nothing like Ma," Ryan protested.
"He's in jail after taking you with him to steal a car," Sandy said. "You could be in jail right now because of him."
"I would be dead if not for him," Ryan replied. "The night we stole the car... Trey was stealing the car so he could take me and get me the hell out of Chino and away from Ma. He was trying to take care of me, like always..."
"By committing a felony?"
"How should he have done it?" Ryan asked. "With his record, there was no one a judge would grant him custody, Ma and AJ would have tracked us down if we stayed in Chino, and there's no way I would have survived another 3 years with those two. Either they would have killed me or I would have killed myself, either way I would have been dead..."
"I can't..."
"Sandy, I'd rather go back to Hanlin street than live with my mom and AJ again," Ryan said. "What does that say about how bad it was? Trey is the one person in the world who ever cared, and I need him, and he is nothing like Ma, he doesn't upset me like she does, he doesn't hurt me like she does..."
"I wanted to see the two of you together, make sure that..."
"Whenever I've seen him, have I come back more or less upset than I was before I saw him?" Ryan asked. "Trey is my stable point, the one unchanging, unrelenting, undeniable thing I have and have always had. He's the one person, one thing, that I have total trust and faith in."
"What about us?" Sandy asked, hurt clear in his voice.
"I've known you 6 months, how can I have the same amount of trust and faith in you as I have for someone who's loved me, protected me, raised me, since I was a baby and he was 4?" Ryan asked.
"We're trying to..."
"I know that, Sandy," Ryan protested. "I know, and you're great, I like it here, I like seeing a couple that's actually functional, it gives me hope for the world. It doesn't change my outlook for myself much, though."
"I also wanted to talk to him about you," Sandy said.
"Feel free to go see him tomorrow, you don't need to use me as an excuse," Ryan said.
Sandy was quiet for a moment, as though he wasn't sure what to say, but finally he spoke again. "I'm worried about you."
"Why?" Ryan said. "I'm taking the meds like I need to, I was doing okay in school, I haven't gotten into any fights except to defend myself that one time..."
"I don't think your handling the news about your health very well."
"I have a disease that is gonna kill me ever so slowly over the next 32 years or so," Ryan said. "How am I suppose to take it?"
"That's exactly why I'm worried!" Sandy said. "You're focusing on how bad it could be, and not that you're healthy right now!"
"I found out yesterday!" Ryan replied. "And promptly got accused of cheating on my girlfriend, then had my mother show up in the middle of the night! Forgive me for not being cheerful and optimistic at the moment!"
"Watch your tone," Sandy said.
"Enough, both of you," Kirsten interrupted.
"Yeah, it is," Ryan said, turning and walking out of the kitchen. He walked right past the livingroom and a stunned Seth and out the front door, slamming it hard enough that they had to have heard, then took off at a jog, letting the cool night air try to calm his temper. He didn't really have any destination in mind, though a few days ago he would have headed to Summer's or a friend's, but now Summer was definitely out of the question and he didn't know where he stood with Luke or the others at the moment, so instead he found himself heading downtown. He slowed to a walk as he reached the business area, and started looking around, noticing things he hadn't before. Like the community center and it's notice board. A light rain began to fall, and Ryan stepped under the protection of the portico to look at the notice board and try to think, and that's when he saw the sign.
Life Support Meeting
8pm, Blue Meeting Room
You're Not Alone.
Ryan hesitated, looking at the flyer, then at the doors, trying to decide if he should go in. Finally, he made a decision and opened the door, following the signs to the Blue Meeting room and taking one more deep breath before cracking the door open just enough to step inside, his eyes sliding over the varied people assembled there, ranging in age from a girl about his age with purple streaks in her blonde hair, to a man who had to be in his 50's. He was nervous as he stepped into the meeting room and for a moment he thought about turning and walking back out. No one knew he'd ended up here, so it wouldn't matter if he didn't actually stay, but then someone spotted him and soon the entire circle had turned to look at him.
"Come sit down and we'll start," one of the men said.
Ryan took a deep breath and moved to slide into a chair between two women, leaning forward so his elbows were resting on his knees and his head was down as one by one they were saying their names. Finally, it was his turn and he looked up. "Ryan," he said in a low voice.
"We're all regulars, but we'd like to hear your story, Ryan, if you don't mind," the man who'd spoken before said. "How long you've known, how you were infected..."
"I've known for sure since yesterday, but I've been living in fear of my next test since February," Ryan said. "I... uh... I was homeless for a while, my mother kicked me because I was with my brother when he committed a crime. I had no money, none of my so-called friends were willing to take me in... I ended up hustling, prostituting myself, just so I could afford food and a crappy apartment. I didn't want to die in an alley because I was too proud. One night, a john refused to wear a condom, and I tried to walk away... I tried to lie and say it was for his protection, that I had HIV... it didn't work because he was HIV positive so he didn't care. He raped me, even though a lot of the cops in Chino say it's impossible to rape a hooker... I said no and he forced it. Almost killed me. But I got these foster parents, who are amazing, they've been trying so hard to help me feel safe, and they got me a female shrink, and a female doctor, so that I'd be okay with being alone with them. Last week, I had a run in with an ex-john, not the one who raped me, but... it was still enough to make me sick to my stomach. Went to the doctor the next day, she ran tests, including blood tests, and... there was backlog at the lab or something, because it was longer than usual before my results came in and she called to say she needed me to come in as soon as possible. I knew the second I found out that she wanted me to come in immediately... I knew I was positive."
"Are you on the cocktail now?" one of the women asked.
"Yeah," Ryan said. "But I was on the preventative stuff and it did nothing." He sighed and shrugged. "I know it's not a death sentence, I know that with modern medicine I could still live to be an old man, but... I always... I'm scared to play soccer with my friends because what if I get hurt and bleed on them? I have issues with sex anyway, but now I gotta think that if I'm ever ready to have sex with a girl, I could infect her... I just... I don't even know why I came here. I got in a fight with my foster dad, and I walked out of the house, and now... I'm here."
"Maybe you just needed to talk to people who actually really do understand, at least part of it, anyway," the man who'd spoken earlier said.
~~~
When the meeting took a break, Ryan got up to get a cup of what he expected to be weak and disgusting coffee. Instead, he found it was pretty good, and refilled his cup after downing half of it in two quick gulps.
"We take turns bringing the good stuff," the girl with the purple streak in her blonde hair said as she got her own cup. "And we never tell the newbies until they've come to a couple meetings, so they usually avoid the coffee."
"Well, I think if I'd brought a beer in here it might have been frowned on, so I need my coffee fix to get through this," Ryan replied.
"You should try the cookies," the girl said, grabbing one for herself. "The muffins are stale and like rocks, but the cookies are good."
Ryan grabbed one and took a bite, nodding. "Pretty good," he replied.
"Thanks, I bought them at the store myself."
Ryan laughed. "Well, you're very talented at that," he joked.
She smiled. "You said you're Ryan, right?"
"Yeah," Ryan said, nodding. "I wasn't really paying attention during the introduction thing..."
"Alex," she said, holding out her hand.
"Nice to meet you," Ryan said, shaking her hand. "Can I ask..."
"I kinda slept around a lot, with boys and girls," Alex said. "My parents didn't approve of the girls, and when I was 16 they told me to either be straight or get out. So... I got out. I ended up living with this girl in LA, that's where I'm from originally, and we partied a lot, and then one day she told me that she had HIV, and I got tested, and so did I, except I hadn't messed around with anyone but her in months, and before her, I'd always used protection and been safe."
"Did she admit to it?"
"Yeah, even introduced me to the guy, a real nice guy," Alex said sarcastically. "So, I took off, left LA, got a job here in Newport managing a club..."
"Yeah?"
"I'm an emancipated minor," Alex said with a grin. "You should come by the club sometime, if you give me your last name I can put you on the 'don't charge them the cover' list. Even a fake last name, just so I can put something on there."
"Ryan Atwood," Ryan replied.
"Alex Kelly."
"Nice to meet you," Ryan said.
"Come on, they're about to start back up, and Josh is hilarious when he's doing good, and judging by his constant grin tonight, he's doing good."
~~~
"So, do you need a ride?" Alex asked as she and Ryan left the community center.
Ryan hesitated, part of him wanting the long walk home as a chance to process, and part of him not wanting to go home at all. "I don't know..."
"You wanna crash somewhere?" Alex asked, seemingly reading his mind. "I've only got one bed, but it's big enough for two people to share platonically."
"You sure?" Ryan asked. "Inviting a guy you only just met, who has admitted to being an ex-hooker, to crash at your place?"
"I could take you in a fight," Alex said.
Ryan chuckled. "Yeah, you probably could," he agreed. "Yeah, I think I would like somewhere to crash."
"Come on, it's just a couple blocks from here."
"So, do you often invite strange guys home with you?" Ryan asked with a smile.
"Only the cute ones who pour their heart out to a room full of strangers," Alex replied.
"So... crazy guys?" Ryan asked.
"Pretty much, yeah," Alex said. "I can't resist the insane ones."
Ryan chuckled. "Thanks."
"People like us, the ones that don't fit into the perfect Newport Mold but still live here? We've gotta stick together."
"Hell yeah," Ryan agreed.
"I got beers at my place," Alex said.
"I think this may be the beginning of a beautiful friendship," Ryan agreed.
To Be Continued...
What would everyone think if I wrote an AU future of this? Based on the snippet of it set like 4 years in the future... like, I'd still write HB, but I'd also write this AU spin-off future that tells the one path it could take? Because I'm kind of in love with that future universe... lol... but even if I put out a chapter a week, with all that goes into this fic, it woudl take me like 7 years to get to that point in the story, and I really want to find out for myself how it's all going to end... lol... so... would anyone want to read the AU Future story? lol
Author: Mara
Rating: R
Warnings: Sex, mentions of rape, violence. Language.
Summary: Ryan didn't call Sandy after Dawn kicked him out, but he still finds his way to the Cohen family.
Notes: ::sigh:: I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this chapter, but I've been sitting on it for a LONG time... a couple weeks... and I figured I should just bite the bullet and post it.
Heavily Broken (Chapter Fifty Eight)
Many thanks to
chrissydechagny for the most excellent banner!By the time they got back to Newport, Sandy was home and he wasn't happy.
"Why is it that I called to check on visiting hours for tomorrow, and the prison told me that my wife and son were there today?" Sandy asked.
"Because I took Ryan to see Trey," Kirsten said simply, putting her purse on the table.
"I thought I..."
"You really don't want to say something that is going to make you sound like my father, do you?" Kirsten asked.
"It's a prison, Kirsten, you shouldn't be..."
"She stayed in the waiting room," Ryan interjected, wanting to defend Kirsten. "I needed to see him, Sandy..."
"And I was going to take you tomorrow..."
"Nothing happened, Sandy," Kirsten said. "I only saw the waiting room and the outside of the place, I didn't see any prisoners, no one said anything rude or crude to me. It's fine. I just took our son to see his brother."
Ryan started at the sound of her calling him their son, but liked the sound of it. "Trey would have never forgiven me if I waited to tell him," he said softly.
"We'll talk about this with you later," Sandy said. "Right now I need to speak to my wife."
"Fine," Ryan said, walking out and heading for the poolhouse. He stopped in the doorway when he spotted Summer sitting on his bed, biting her lower lip. "What are you doing here?" he asked her.
"I made a mistake..." Summer began.
"Yeah, you did," Ryan replied. "I can't even think about sex without thinking about what happened to me, and you're accusing me of cheating on you? I was in love with you, Summer. When I was with you, I could forget for a little while how royally fucked up my life is. I thought I'd tell you, and you'd hold me and tell em it would be okay, that I'm strong and I'll be okay..."
"I can..." Summer said.
"No, you can't," Ryan said. "Do you have any idea how much it hurt to have you say those things? How... I'd barely known an hour that I have HIV, and my girlfriend was being such a world class bitch to me."
"I'm sorry..."
"My Ma was always sorry. And my Dad. Who knows, maybe even those men who fucked me in alleys are sorry. But it doesn't take back any of it, it can't take back any of it. Sorry doesn't make it all better, Summer, it can't. Not when the hurt is this deep, and raw, and painful."
"Ry..."
"I can't do this, Summer. Not now, not when I'm still trying to figure out how the hell I'm gonna do anything that I dreamed of doing with my life. The one thing I always wanted is completely gone now, and I need time to deal with that before I deal with you."
"Ryan, please... I'm sorry... I love you..."
"You can't love someone you don't trust, Summer," Ryan said softly. "That's part of why this hurts so bad. I trusted that you loved me, but... but clearly you don't... not as much as I loved you."
"Ryan..."
"Please go," Ryan said, opening the door and looking away. "Please, just go."
Summer slowly stood, her hand to her mouth as she walked past him. "I... I'm sorry..." she repeated.
"Goodbye, Summer," Ryan whispered, not meeting her gaze as he closed the door. Slowly, he walked over to his bed and sat down, aware that Summer was still standing out there, watching him with wide, tear filled eyes.
~~~
Dinner was tense, but manageable, especially since Seth kept things lighter by talking about how great Che was once you got to know him. It was after dinner that things took a turn for the worse. Ryan and Kirsten were prewashing the dishes while Seth was in the living room trying to pick a game to play with Ryan, and Sandy approached them. "I had my reasons for wanting to be the one who took Ryan," he said.
"Then explain them to us, Sandy," Kirsten said, making it clear that she wanted Ryan to stay for this. "Explain why you wanted to make him wait another day."
"Ryan, we've seen what your mother does to you, we've seen it twice..." Sandy began.
"Trey is nothing like Ma," Ryan protested.
"He's in jail after taking you with him to steal a car," Sandy said. "You could be in jail right now because of him."
"I would be dead if not for him," Ryan replied. "The night we stole the car... Trey was stealing the car so he could take me and get me the hell out of Chino and away from Ma. He was trying to take care of me, like always..."
"By committing a felony?"
"How should he have done it?" Ryan asked. "With his record, there was no one a judge would grant him custody, Ma and AJ would have tracked us down if we stayed in Chino, and there's no way I would have survived another 3 years with those two. Either they would have killed me or I would have killed myself, either way I would have been dead..."
"I can't..."
"Sandy, I'd rather go back to Hanlin street than live with my mom and AJ again," Ryan said. "What does that say about how bad it was? Trey is the one person in the world who ever cared, and I need him, and he is nothing like Ma, he doesn't upset me like she does, he doesn't hurt me like she does..."
"I wanted to see the two of you together, make sure that..."
"Whenever I've seen him, have I come back more or less upset than I was before I saw him?" Ryan asked. "Trey is my stable point, the one unchanging, unrelenting, undeniable thing I have and have always had. He's the one person, one thing, that I have total trust and faith in."
"What about us?" Sandy asked, hurt clear in his voice.
"I've known you 6 months, how can I have the same amount of trust and faith in you as I have for someone who's loved me, protected me, raised me, since I was a baby and he was 4?" Ryan asked.
"We're trying to..."
"I know that, Sandy," Ryan protested. "I know, and you're great, I like it here, I like seeing a couple that's actually functional, it gives me hope for the world. It doesn't change my outlook for myself much, though."
"I also wanted to talk to him about you," Sandy said.
"Feel free to go see him tomorrow, you don't need to use me as an excuse," Ryan said.
Sandy was quiet for a moment, as though he wasn't sure what to say, but finally he spoke again. "I'm worried about you."
"Why?" Ryan said. "I'm taking the meds like I need to, I was doing okay in school, I haven't gotten into any fights except to defend myself that one time..."
"I don't think your handling the news about your health very well."
"I have a disease that is gonna kill me ever so slowly over the next 32 years or so," Ryan said. "How am I suppose to take it?"
"That's exactly why I'm worried!" Sandy said. "You're focusing on how bad it could be, and not that you're healthy right now!"
"I found out yesterday!" Ryan replied. "And promptly got accused of cheating on my girlfriend, then had my mother show up in the middle of the night! Forgive me for not being cheerful and optimistic at the moment!"
"Watch your tone," Sandy said.
"Enough, both of you," Kirsten interrupted.
"Yeah, it is," Ryan said, turning and walking out of the kitchen. He walked right past the livingroom and a stunned Seth and out the front door, slamming it hard enough that they had to have heard, then took off at a jog, letting the cool night air try to calm his temper. He didn't really have any destination in mind, though a few days ago he would have headed to Summer's or a friend's, but now Summer was definitely out of the question and he didn't know where he stood with Luke or the others at the moment, so instead he found himself heading downtown. He slowed to a walk as he reached the business area, and started looking around, noticing things he hadn't before. Like the community center and it's notice board. A light rain began to fall, and Ryan stepped under the protection of the portico to look at the notice board and try to think, and that's when he saw the sign.
8pm, Blue Meeting Room
You're Not Alone.
Ryan hesitated, looking at the flyer, then at the doors, trying to decide if he should go in. Finally, he made a decision and opened the door, following the signs to the Blue Meeting room and taking one more deep breath before cracking the door open just enough to step inside, his eyes sliding over the varied people assembled there, ranging in age from a girl about his age with purple streaks in her blonde hair, to a man who had to be in his 50's. He was nervous as he stepped into the meeting room and for a moment he thought about turning and walking back out. No one knew he'd ended up here, so it wouldn't matter if he didn't actually stay, but then someone spotted him and soon the entire circle had turned to look at him.
"Come sit down and we'll start," one of the men said.
Ryan took a deep breath and moved to slide into a chair between two women, leaning forward so his elbows were resting on his knees and his head was down as one by one they were saying their names. Finally, it was his turn and he looked up. "Ryan," he said in a low voice.
"We're all regulars, but we'd like to hear your story, Ryan, if you don't mind," the man who'd spoken before said. "How long you've known, how you were infected..."
"I've known for sure since yesterday, but I've been living in fear of my next test since February," Ryan said. "I... uh... I was homeless for a while, my mother kicked me because I was with my brother when he committed a crime. I had no money, none of my so-called friends were willing to take me in... I ended up hustling, prostituting myself, just so I could afford food and a crappy apartment. I didn't want to die in an alley because I was too proud. One night, a john refused to wear a condom, and I tried to walk away... I tried to lie and say it was for his protection, that I had HIV... it didn't work because he was HIV positive so he didn't care. He raped me, even though a lot of the cops in Chino say it's impossible to rape a hooker... I said no and he forced it. Almost killed me. But I got these foster parents, who are amazing, they've been trying so hard to help me feel safe, and they got me a female shrink, and a female doctor, so that I'd be okay with being alone with them. Last week, I had a run in with an ex-john, not the one who raped me, but... it was still enough to make me sick to my stomach. Went to the doctor the next day, she ran tests, including blood tests, and... there was backlog at the lab or something, because it was longer than usual before my results came in and she called to say she needed me to come in as soon as possible. I knew the second I found out that she wanted me to come in immediately... I knew I was positive."
"Are you on the cocktail now?" one of the women asked.
"Yeah," Ryan said. "But I was on the preventative stuff and it did nothing." He sighed and shrugged. "I know it's not a death sentence, I know that with modern medicine I could still live to be an old man, but... I always... I'm scared to play soccer with my friends because what if I get hurt and bleed on them? I have issues with sex anyway, but now I gotta think that if I'm ever ready to have sex with a girl, I could infect her... I just... I don't even know why I came here. I got in a fight with my foster dad, and I walked out of the house, and now... I'm here."
"Maybe you just needed to talk to people who actually really do understand, at least part of it, anyway," the man who'd spoken earlier said.
~~~
When the meeting took a break, Ryan got up to get a cup of what he expected to be weak and disgusting coffee. Instead, he found it was pretty good, and refilled his cup after downing half of it in two quick gulps.
"We take turns bringing the good stuff," the girl with the purple streak in her blonde hair said as she got her own cup. "And we never tell the newbies until they've come to a couple meetings, so they usually avoid the coffee."
"Well, I think if I'd brought a beer in here it might have been frowned on, so I need my coffee fix to get through this," Ryan replied.
"You should try the cookies," the girl said, grabbing one for herself. "The muffins are stale and like rocks, but the cookies are good."
Ryan grabbed one and took a bite, nodding. "Pretty good," he replied.
"Thanks, I bought them at the store myself."
Ryan laughed. "Well, you're very talented at that," he joked.
She smiled. "You said you're Ryan, right?"
"Yeah," Ryan said, nodding. "I wasn't really paying attention during the introduction thing..."
"Alex," she said, holding out her hand.
"Nice to meet you," Ryan said, shaking her hand. "Can I ask..."
"I kinda slept around a lot, with boys and girls," Alex said. "My parents didn't approve of the girls, and when I was 16 they told me to either be straight or get out. So... I got out. I ended up living with this girl in LA, that's where I'm from originally, and we partied a lot, and then one day she told me that she had HIV, and I got tested, and so did I, except I hadn't messed around with anyone but her in months, and before her, I'd always used protection and been safe."
"Did she admit to it?"
"Yeah, even introduced me to the guy, a real nice guy," Alex said sarcastically. "So, I took off, left LA, got a job here in Newport managing a club..."
"Yeah?"
"I'm an emancipated minor," Alex said with a grin. "You should come by the club sometime, if you give me your last name I can put you on the 'don't charge them the cover' list. Even a fake last name, just so I can put something on there."
"Ryan Atwood," Ryan replied.
"Alex Kelly."
"Nice to meet you," Ryan said.
"Come on, they're about to start back up, and Josh is hilarious when he's doing good, and judging by his constant grin tonight, he's doing good."
~~~
"So, do you need a ride?" Alex asked as she and Ryan left the community center.
Ryan hesitated, part of him wanting the long walk home as a chance to process, and part of him not wanting to go home at all. "I don't know..."
"You wanna crash somewhere?" Alex asked, seemingly reading his mind. "I've only got one bed, but it's big enough for two people to share platonically."
"You sure?" Ryan asked. "Inviting a guy you only just met, who has admitted to being an ex-hooker, to crash at your place?"
"I could take you in a fight," Alex said.
Ryan chuckled. "Yeah, you probably could," he agreed. "Yeah, I think I would like somewhere to crash."
"Come on, it's just a couple blocks from here."
"So, do you often invite strange guys home with you?" Ryan asked with a smile.
"Only the cute ones who pour their heart out to a room full of strangers," Alex replied.
"So... crazy guys?" Ryan asked.
"Pretty much, yeah," Alex said. "I can't resist the insane ones."
Ryan chuckled. "Thanks."
"People like us, the ones that don't fit into the perfect Newport Mold but still live here? We've gotta stick together."
"Hell yeah," Ryan agreed.
"I got beers at my place," Alex said.
"I think this may be the beginning of a beautiful friendship," Ryan agreed.
To Be Continued...
What would everyone think if I wrote an AU future of this? Based on the snippet of it set like 4 years in the future... like, I'd still write HB, but I'd also write this AU spin-off future that tells the one path it could take? Because I'm kind of in love with that future universe... lol... but even if I put out a chapter a week, with all that goes into this fic, it woudl take me like 7 years to get to that point in the story, and I really want to find out for myself how it's all going to end... lol... so... would anyone want to read the AU Future story? lol
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no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 04:51 am (UTC)That was a great post
Date: 2007-10-15 05:26 am (UTC)As for a future version of this to see where everyone ends up, I like the idea. It kind of gives everyone something to look forward to.
Question though. May I please be added back to the people that are allowed to comment list ?
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Date: 2007-10-15 05:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 06:51 am (UTC)As long as HB continues because I love it.
But I'm sure that future HB would be just as good. My only question is how you would do it without giving away exactly where HB is headed.
But if you've worked that out then please full steam ahead.
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Date: 2007-10-16 12:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-16 04:29 am (UTC)I'll look forward to it.
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Date: 2007-10-15 07:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 07:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 09:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 07:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-15 07:36 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for the update. The Sandy/Kirsten tension is interesting and a real change in that dynamic. I was waiting and wondering to see how Ryan would react to an upset Sandy. Although I'm curious to see if he attends any more meetings, I guess I'm more invested in having him get some support at home- and with the lovely doctor too.
Good for Ryan for being honest, both with Summer and with Sandy. It's something he never lets himself do, despite his own moral code, so it's a relief that he can express himself even if he has been again pushed to the brink to do so.
Thanks again...
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Date: 2007-10-15 09:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-10-19 08:29 pm (UTC)Post more soon :)
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Date: 2007-10-24 04:45 am (UTC)He and Summer were so very sweet, but she really blew it, didn't she. And he's so vulnerable right now she may never [?] get another chance....
Perfect time to introduce a character like Alex. I'm intruiged where that friendship might go- and to see how bad the Cohens whig out over him staying out all night!
I'm also intrigued by your notion of a future fic of a possible outcome of this- a future AU of an AU- that's a first for me! But if you've got an idea, by all means go with it- as you say, since it's AU, it's only one possible future of this situation.
Thanks again for an ongoing, compelling fic.
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Date: 2007-11-11 05:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-12-18 12:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-13 09:26 am (UTC)? its so good? is the hiv test going to be a false positive?
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Date: 2008-02-16 12:32 pm (UTC)