Breathe No More (Hallelujah #2)
Apr. 4th, 2008 04:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
missmara13Title: Breathe No More
Author: Mara
Fandoms: The OC/OTH
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Angst
Summary: Too small to matter, but big enough to cut me into so many little pieces.
Notes: The 2nd in the 'Hallelujah' series, this one is Brooke's POV about the events shortly before Ryan left her, and explains the break up, at least sort of. As before, there was a specific song I listened to that set the tone of the story, in this case sad and longing was provided by 'Breathe No More' by Evanescence.
Breathe No More
Brooke looked up from where she was sitting cross legged on the living room floor with her sketchbook open in her lap and smiled as Ryan came in. "Welcome home," she said.
"New ideas?" he asked as he walked over to sit beside her and peeked over her shoulder at the designs.
"Yeah," Brooke said, turning to kiss him. "How was work?"
"Same as always," Ryan said, putting an arm around her shoulders. "You?"
"My mom came by the store," Brooke said. "She wants to have dinner with us, meet you."
"Yeah?" Ryan said. "That's good, right?"
"She cares about my life, so... yeah," Brooke said. "It's really good."
~~~
Brooke had been happy to tell her mom about her life, and held Ryan's hand on the table as she talked, telling Victoria all about her job at a clothing boutique, and Ryan's job as a waiter at an Italian restaurant downtown. But while she was in the bathroom, something changed because when she got back Ryan was suddenly a lot more serious and her mother was trying to distract her from it. As Victoria let them out of her limo in front of their building, Brooke hugged her mom. "It was so nice seeing you, mom," she said.
"It was wonderful to see you, too, Brooke," Victoria said. "Nice meeting you, Ryan."
Ryan just nodded, and Brooke frowned at him as the car pulled away. "What's wrong?" she asked.
"Nothing," Ryan said, forcing a smile and shaking his head. "Come on, let's go inside."
~~~
It was later, as Brooke climbed into bed and realized Ryan was joining her like usual, instead he was standing in the doorway, watching her with a troubled look on his face, that she realized whatever it was, it was serious. "Ry?"
"What are we doing, Brooke?" Ryan asked.
"What are you talking about?"
"You... You should be wearing designer clothes like your mom does, and traveling in limos, and living in penthouses..."
"Yeah, and you shouldn't have to serve jackasses who wouldn't know good service from their asses," Brooke replied. "I like my life..."
"No, Brooke... Why are we... you can't really think this is working."
"What are you..."
"We're never gonna be the same, Brooke. We're never gonna fit right..."
"Ry..."
"I think we've been kidding ourselves, and seeing your mom, and the life you could and should have..."
"Ryan, just come to bed, you're not..."
"We don't fit together, Brooke. We can't."
Brooke didn't respond for a long moment, hurt clear in her eyes. "If you really think that... maybe this isn't working," she finally said.
"I'm... I'm gonna crash on the couch," Ryan said, turning away.
"I love you," Brooke said.
"Love's not a fix-all," Ryan replied before walking out and quietly closing the door behind him.
After several long moments of sitting their in stunned silence, Brooke finally got up and walked over to crack open the door and peek out at Ryan. He was sitting on the couch, his back to her and his head in his hands as his shoulders shook. She wanted to go to him, to try to get him to explain why he was saying these things, but she knew him well enough to know he needed space. She'd talk to him in the morning and convince him he was being ridiculous, because she'd never been happier, not even when she'd had all the things she could ever have wanted. She'd been alone and empty when all she had was the things, but once she had him she'd felt loved and wanted. He'd accepted her, flaws included and loved right along with everything else. Or at least she thought he had.
In the morning, she'd make him talk to her, and she'd figure out how to get through to him about how wrong he was.
The End
Ahem... if you've been watching Season 5 and think about Victoria's attitude towards Lucas, especially in the flashback to when Lucas visited Brooke in New York, you'll probably figure out what happened...
Author: Mara
Fandoms: The OC/OTH
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Angst
Summary: Too small to matter, but big enough to cut me into so many little pieces.
Notes: The 2nd in the 'Hallelujah' series, this one is Brooke's POV about the events shortly before Ryan left her, and explains the break up, at least sort of. As before, there was a specific song I listened to that set the tone of the story, in this case sad and longing was provided by 'Breathe No More' by Evanescence.
Breathe No More
Brooke looked up from where she was sitting cross legged on the living room floor with her sketchbook open in her lap and smiled as Ryan came in. "Welcome home," she said.
"New ideas?" he asked as he walked over to sit beside her and peeked over her shoulder at the designs.
"Yeah," Brooke said, turning to kiss him. "How was work?"
"Same as always," Ryan said, putting an arm around her shoulders. "You?"
"My mom came by the store," Brooke said. "She wants to have dinner with us, meet you."
"Yeah?" Ryan said. "That's good, right?"
"She cares about my life, so... yeah," Brooke said. "It's really good."
~~~
Brooke had been happy to tell her mom about her life, and held Ryan's hand on the table as she talked, telling Victoria all about her job at a clothing boutique, and Ryan's job as a waiter at an Italian restaurant downtown. But while she was in the bathroom, something changed because when she got back Ryan was suddenly a lot more serious and her mother was trying to distract her from it. As Victoria let them out of her limo in front of their building, Brooke hugged her mom. "It was so nice seeing you, mom," she said.
"It was wonderful to see you, too, Brooke," Victoria said. "Nice meeting you, Ryan."
Ryan just nodded, and Brooke frowned at him as the car pulled away. "What's wrong?" she asked.
"Nothing," Ryan said, forcing a smile and shaking his head. "Come on, let's go inside."
~~~
It was later, as Brooke climbed into bed and realized Ryan was joining her like usual, instead he was standing in the doorway, watching her with a troubled look on his face, that she realized whatever it was, it was serious. "Ry?"
"What are we doing, Brooke?" Ryan asked.
"What are you talking about?"
"You... You should be wearing designer clothes like your mom does, and traveling in limos, and living in penthouses..."
"Yeah, and you shouldn't have to serve jackasses who wouldn't know good service from their asses," Brooke replied. "I like my life..."
"No, Brooke... Why are we... you can't really think this is working."
"What are you..."
"We're never gonna be the same, Brooke. We're never gonna fit right..."
"Ry..."
"I think we've been kidding ourselves, and seeing your mom, and the life you could and should have..."
"Ryan, just come to bed, you're not..."
"We don't fit together, Brooke. We can't."
Brooke didn't respond for a long moment, hurt clear in her eyes. "If you really think that... maybe this isn't working," she finally said.
"I'm... I'm gonna crash on the couch," Ryan said, turning away.
"I love you," Brooke said.
"Love's not a fix-all," Ryan replied before walking out and quietly closing the door behind him.
After several long moments of sitting their in stunned silence, Brooke finally got up and walked over to crack open the door and peek out at Ryan. He was sitting on the couch, his back to her and his head in his hands as his shoulders shook. She wanted to go to him, to try to get him to explain why he was saying these things, but she knew him well enough to know he needed space. She'd talk to him in the morning and convince him he was being ridiculous, because she'd never been happier, not even when she'd had all the things she could ever have wanted. She'd been alone and empty when all she had was the things, but once she had him she'd felt loved and wanted. He'd accepted her, flaws included and loved right along with everything else. Or at least she thought he had.
In the morning, she'd make him talk to her, and she'd figure out how to get through to him about how wrong he was.
The End
Ahem... if you've been watching Season 5 and think about Victoria's attitude towards Lucas, especially in the flashback to when Lucas visited Brooke in New York, you'll probably figure out what happened...
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no subject
Date: 2008-04-04 10:51 pm (UTC)Fix this, please?
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Date: 2008-04-04 11:00 pm (UTC)I can promise that there are going to be a couple (two are already written, I jsut need to figure out what I want to post next... lol) little stories in this universe that take place in the future, long after the break up, but have Ryan and Brooke seeing eachother... you'll see that despite the leaving, Ryan didn't entirely give up... lol
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Date: 2008-04-05 12:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-04-05 02:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-04-05 02:48 pm (UTC)Update Soon!
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Date: 2008-04-07 08:37 pm (UTC)